Liner Notes

Music by Kris McDaniel, Ben Bradley, Carrie Jenkins, and Hille Paakkunainen.
Lyrics by Kris McDaniel and Ben Bradley.

Ben Bradley — vocals, acoustic guitar, electric bass
Carrie Jenkins — vocals
Kris McDaniel — banjitar, electric slide guitar
Hille Paakkunainen — edrums

Recorded by the 21st Century Monads in Syracuse.
Mixed by Kris McDaniel.

Art by Paul Prescott


Lyrics

I’m more organized than my peers
I have a calm and even tone
But now I’m pounding back beers
And crying alone
I did good work on committees
And supervising undergrad studies
And my sentence for these crimes
Is six years time

I don’t want to be the chair
Running meetings is not my style
So if you take this cup from my lips
I’ll make it worth your while
I don’t want to be the chair
I don’t think I’m the guy
To manage interpersonal conflicts
When they inevitably arise

Now they call me the Lazy Monad
But it’s not about being lazy
It’s a matter of sanity and basic human dignity
What would I sacrifice
To get out of being chair?
My left testicle
Maybe French fries for a year

I don’t want to be the chair
Balancing the budget sheets
And when we come up short
To have to grovel to the dean
I don’t want to be the chair
Don’t even know who the vice-provost is
Or who of the other administrators’
Butts I have to kiss

My friends told me I’m a moron
For agreeing to take this on
I should have listened to the Bastard
Who helped to write this song
So I’ll kiss my kids goodbye
Across the border I will go
Let some other sucker be chair
The sun’s warm in Mexico

I don’t want to be the chair
Not even for a year
That’s how long the PEH did it
Before she disappeared
I don’t want to be the chair
All responsibility and no power
I don’t want to be the chair
I’d rather be food for the flowers

I don’t want to be the chair
No, I don’t want to be the chair
No, I don’t want to be the chair